Chance is a fine thing

If midnight is the witching hour, then 1am is definitely the bitching hour. And boy, am I bitchy.

I've just crawled out of bed for the second time since midnight. I find it easier to roam around when my legs are on fire than to pretend I can lie in bed and roast quietly. But while I was lying (and roasting) I was thinking of how easy it is for medical specialists to make broad pronouncements that are completely erroneous, potentially damaging and at best incompetent.

I received in the mail a copy of the report sent to my doc from my neuro (The Brick) about my appointment last week. Boy, I'd love to know who was in the room when he formed that little number because it doesn't sound like it was me.

It's filled with nonsense that starts with him getting the start date of my nystagmus attack wrong - by 10 months (he thinks it was January despite me giving him a piece of paper, as well as telling him that the date was November 17th).

Follows on with stuff about my last optic neuritis attacks never being clearly well documented over recent years (because the GP rang him while I was in the office in some urgency and was fobbed off with it appears no notes being taken of the call and subsequent problems were light and didn't warrant a doc visit).

Proceeds to mention that I have no clearly documented relapses in my MS in 4 years (but Im not theoretically considered relapsing/remitting so that is hardly surprising).

Goes on to mention that there is no evidence of improvement after my 18 months of chemo (considering my care was all GP based and he hasn't seen me since he wrote the script under instruction from my "second opinion" neurologist in Auckland before leaving the country for a 12 month sabbatical on the other side of the planet, although my doc and his locums saw me plenty).

Continues on to say that while I prefer to use a crutch, my walking is adequate (based on my walking 20 feet down the hallway to sit in a chair to have my eyes tested and after only a short, crutch-assisted walk from the back door to outpatients, not a long trek from the other side of the hospital carpark in the heat as is usually the case)

and finishes up with a rundown of some of the drugs that my GP has trialled in an effort to relieve some of this misery and suggests a new drug, Clonazepam, might be appropriate to relieve the intense burning and jerking spasm at night (despite my not requiring any of them 4 years ago, yet according to him my MS is no worse than it was then).

It's hardly any wonder that no-one I have spoken to (there have been quite a few now) who was ever had the misfortune to need to consult with this "professional" can stand him.

He seems like a pissy little boy who still holds a grudge for being forced to send me to another neurologist against his will, one who not only gave me the (effective) treatment The Brick wouldn't, but made his thinly veiled displeasure with the situation known in a letter, a copy of which was sent to me.

And yet The Brick is supposedly held in high regard in his field.

Just occasionally, there are apparent compensations for living in Auckland (such a shame I can't afford to live there) - having ready access to a decent neurologist at Auckland Hospital is clearly one of them. I do not understand how a District Health Board the size of ours, covering an urban population of over 100,000 people and a large regional population cannot provide an alternative neurologist in an area with, apart from other neurological disorders, a significant number of MS patients and a relatively elderly population well representing, no doubt, a significant number of stroke patients.

I suppose the bright side is that at least Clonazepam isn't an anti-psychotic, although this man is almost enough to induce, at least temporary, psychosis

Clonazepam:
• Clonazepam is in a class of drugs called benzodiazepines. Clonazepam affects chemicals in your brain that may become unbalanced and cause seizures.
• Clonazepam is used to treat seizures.
• Clonazepam may also be used for purposes other than those listed in this medication guide.

Cautions:
• Use caution when driving, operating machinery, or performing other hazardous activities. Clonazepam will cause drowsiness and may cause dizziness. If you experience drowsiness or dizziness, avoid these activities.
• Use alcohol cautiously. Alcohol may increase drowsiness and dizziness while you are taking Clonazepam. Alcohol may also increase your risk of having a seizure.
• Avoid other sedatives, sleeping pills, and tranquilizers. They should not be used while you are taking Clonazepam unless your doctor approves.

Side effects:
· an allergic reaction (difficulty breathing; closing of your throat; swelling of your lips, face, or tongue; or hives);
· sores in your mouth or throat;
· yellowing of the skin or eyes;
· a rash;
· hallucinations or severe confusion; or
· changes in your vision. (haha hahahahaha)

Other drugs will affect Clonazepam:
· only half the bloody drugs I take for various symptomatic and pain relief.

That's one hell of a drug to recommend for someone who has had no deterioration in 4 years.